February 27 - The Dudes

Before we get into tonight's show, The Seer would be remiss if he didn't comment on this whole Antonella Barba firestorm. First, let's examine the facts:

• Antonella is totally freakin' hot
• The photos in question clearly indicate that she would like to date The Seer
• The Seer is one of the great romantic icons of our time

Now that we know the facts, there is only one conclusion to be drawn...Antonella does not deserve to be kicked off the show.

I should also mention that, as an important part of my research for this blog, I checked out the hardcore photos of Antonella online 45 minutes ago. I also checked them out 30 minutes ago and 15 minutes ago. Hold on...okay, I just checked them out again. After carefully studying the photos, I can say without equivocation that Paula is drunk.

On with the show...

They start off the show with a little nod to Jennifer Hudson, who won an Oscar the other night. Did anyone else notice that Beyonce made Jennifer sound like an amateur Sunday night? Hudson missed about a hundred notes, just like she used to on Idol, which is why she didn't come close to winning. Jennifer Hudson winning an Oscar might be the biggest travesty in the history of the Academy Awards. She sang great in the movie and she was decent in the role. But an Oscar? Give The Seer a break.

Phil Stacey starts things off this week. He was sensational last week after a weak start. Let's see if he can keep it going. Interesting song choice. It fits his voice well. And he's getting better as the song goes on again. The Seer's Wife wants to know what he looks like with hair. The Seer wants to know what The Seer's Wife looks like without a huge stomach. (By the way, I cleared that line with TSW before I posted this.) Anyway, Phil was great tonight. The only knock against him is that now I'm going to be singing John Waite all night.

On to Jared Cotter, who's about to bust out some Marvin Gaye. Dangerous choice. You'd better be good if you're gonna do Marvin. Why am I thinking he won't be up to the task? He actually sounds better than I thought he would. But did he just dedicate "Let's Get It On" to his parents? And what's with the sneakers? TSW says he's not a star and he has no X-factor. I thought he was pretty good. Not great, but pretty good.

It's time for A.J. Tabaldo. He sounds good so far, but what is this song? Okay, I know it now. He's a bit effeminate, but the boy can sing. And besides, being effeminate never hurt Clay Aiken or The Seer's Brother. Excellent and surprising job by A.J. So far this has been a pretty good show.

Oh no. It's Sanjaya Malakar, the most annoying Idol contestant since John Stevens. What's wrong with this freak? He's not even singing. He's basically talking with a little bit of flair. Why is a 17-year-old kid singing a 45-year-old man's song? There was just just no there there. Boring as balls. By the way, Paula is as sober tonight as she's been in years. Good for the old girl, but I miss crazy, whacked out Paula. Somebody get the woman a Xanax or nine.

Chris Sligh's up next. That's some hairdo. He looks like a cross between Justin Guarini and a blowfish. Good thing he can sing. Another good song choice for Chris. He said he was going to choose great songs, and he's lived up to it so far. Count The Seer among those who don't understand why Chris' wife is with him, though.

On to Nick Pedro, who needs to step up his game after last week's performance. How many times has this song been done on this show? But I've got to say, he's doing a nice job with it. He has a unique tone to his voice, and when he picks the right song he can really shine. And he shone tonight. Most of the guys have picked really good songs tonight. Simon says he has a charismar issue, whatever that means.

Here comes Blake Lewis. He's definitely the most fun contestant this season. Blake always does something cool. He doesn't sound that great, but he probably doesn't need to. And the little beatbox scat thing he did in the middle of the song was awesome. That's an amazing talent, and when he incorporates it properly in to his performances, it's a huge bonus. Simon just bowed to the god of Paular Abdul. I guess that's how they do it in Californiar.

It's Brandon Rogers' turn. He was probably the biggest disappointment last week, so he needs a strong showing. Ten words into this song, it's just about the worst performance in Idol history. God this is awful. It's godawful. Why do people keep singing this song? It single-handedly ruined that chick's chances a couple years ago. What was her name? Nadia? We can't remember her name because she sang this song. Let this be a lesson to the contestants. No more Cyndi Lauper. That was abysmal. American Idol suicide, according to TSW. I agree. Stop with the clever comments, TSW. Or I'm gonna start using them without attributing them to you.

The penultimate spot tonight goes to Chris Richardson. He actually reminds me a bit of Blake style-wise, but he's not as talented or as fun. What's this song called? Geek in the Pink? What the hell does that mean? If that was hotter than the original, as Randy says, I'd hate to hear the original. What? The judges loved it. TSW loved it. Sorry, I didn't get it. It looked to me like he was trying to do his best Katharine Hepburn impression. TSW says I'm out of touch with how the kids do it these days. I'll touch you, TSW.

Can Sundance Head be the awesome anchorman tonight? Oooh, crying in the pre-song package. Excellent move, Sundance! Now this is more like it. This is like the Sundance we saw in his original audition. He needed a performance like this. Good to have you back, Sunny.

This was one of the better shows we've seen in a while. There were only a few clunkers, and nearly everybody picked a good song. Based on their performances, Sanjaya and Brandon deserve to go. But neither will. The Seer sees Jared Cotter and Nick Pedro going home.

That's it for tonight. I'm off to vote for Antonella...

Sincerely,
Your Friendly, Neighborhood Seer